This one's closed, and this one's closed, and this one's closed. [Le deuxieme jour]

To all those living vicariously through me [your words not mine, David and Ashley], this is where to get your details. If I skimp on the text updates, it's only because I am enjoying my time in NYC. Also, I'm in and out of Subways a lot. No cell service sous sol. Don't take it to heart if I don't answer your text.

Sorry to be a blog-tease, but I've been fighting with the network for a half an hour, and now it's time for me to get some breakfast.

I will close out the first day and give you deets on the second on this post later tonight. Scout's honor.

UPDATE:
DAY 1:

The only crappy thing about the day was the sole heckler we met during the day. On the night-bus tour [again, I know it's lame] some guy decided to flip our bus not one, but two birds, and shout, "Hey, welcome to New York!"

Aside from that everyone behaves like your average human being. Not rude. Not overly friendly. Just normal. Go figure.

DAY 2:

Marcus and I explored SoHo. [read: shopped. It is me and Marcus, after all.]

Passed by the NY Times offices and lunched at Dean & Deluca [chocolate tortini = orgasmic. And sadly, trumps anything I've ever baked.], which is right next to the Mecca of journalism. Decided to submit applications. I'm hoping to become their youngest food critic. Keep your fingers crossed.

Ben met us for a half second there, was going to spend a little quality time, and then had to jet to meet one of his other friends. Asshat. [I kid.]

Mosied down 5th Avenue. Decided to go to Sunday Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral. [I hope you're happy, grandma and grandpa.]

Went to the Guggenheim, only to find out they're doing construction so only 2 levels are open at the moment. Very nicely a docent told us we should probably come back after Friday when they open fully. We'll be upstate all day Friday, so it's looking like the Googs will have to be squeezed in on Saturday.

After the Guggenheim was a no-go, MLP and I decided to head out to Queens to check out the PS1 exhibit. [Running joke of the day: "Hey Ben, we ended up in Queens, too! Only we meant to."] Found out they are closed on Tuesdays. It was Tuesday. Awesome. That is also getting squeezed in at a later time.

Subwayed/walked to the Times Square area for the musical that night. wore flats on the train, changed shoes in line for the play. In the Heights was fabulous. Some [Marcus] didn't care for it, but said nameless parties [MLP] don't like musicals very much.

The lyrics were well done, and a lot of it was rapped, which was an interesting twist. Fitting for the setting, though.

Walked/subwayed back to Chelsea to find some dinner for the other folks. Did not wear flats on the way back. [5" low-profile black pointed-toe stilettos on the pavements of Manhattan. Yes, I am a martyr for fashion.] Surprisingly not a painful experience. Except for my almost tripping on the steps of the subway and tumbling to my untimely death.

Post cut short again. Ben called. Heading to meet him in Harlem. All by my lonesome. Hope I don't die. Or get lost. The latter is a high possibility.

I'm down with NYC! Yeah, you know me. [Le premier jour]

Morning.

Get it out of your head. It's not as big as you think. Or crowded. Or shiny. Or dirty. Or scary. Or stylish. Or mean.

The gayborhood isn't even as gay as you would think [You probably have to go to The Castro for balls out pride, and that is clear across the country], though I have seen quite a few homosexual men with whom I would like to be friends.

The people here are, get this, it's going to blow your mind, normal. You just lost your shit, I'm sure. The average person on the street, tourist or not, is just as average as any Oklahoman [though there is a notable decrease in obesity among the natives.

One guy did stop the Pegster to ask where she was from. When sshe replied "Oklahoma" he said, "I didn't know people lived there." [Many not by choice, mister, I assure you.] He also told her he'd "never seen 'one of those' before."

Day 1:
Wake: 4 AM. Not pleased
Flight departure: 6ish
Mehphis: around 8 or so
NYC: near noon

Tiniest room known to man, but it is on Manhattan. [Chelsea. Street-view window. I want a Brownstone.] I'm pretty sure my suitcase takes up a third of the space in here, though that says more about the size of my suitcase and less about the smallness of the room.

Bus tours most of the day. Uptown and the night- route. Yes, it is lame. Yes, it is less lame than you'd think. [Especially when you have a sweet night-tour driver named Russell who'll slow and stop for photos whenever the hell you want, and gives free rides to working stiffs who need a lift to Brooklyn.] It's a good way to get your bearings in the city and see a little bit of everything. [If you're going to be here for only one week, seeing as you are a tourist, you might as well.]

Sammie-type eateries for both lunch and dinner [we were tired and unimaginative last night]. Delish. And no more expensive than Panera, really. [I ate for $21 yesterday. You and your "yumm-o" can suck it, Rachel Ray.]

Movies and television may have ruined NYC for most people. It's cleaner, the people are prettier, and the camera angles make everything look big as hell. It's not that big [coming from a tiny individual such as myself, that's saying quite a bit]. I mean, it's big, don't get me wrong, but so is Chicago, and LA, and Houston. Maybe living in one of those cities virtually my entire life leaves this place less overwhelming.

Still, I think I love this place. It remains to be seen. As I told MLP yesterday, I could totally love living here, but I could also totally love living in Austin. [Probably more. It's that whole Texas Pride thing [not the crazy conservative, gun-toting, redneck kind]. I know you don't understand. Trust me when I say, Texas Pride is built in. It's in our genetic code, I swear. Texans can recognize other Texans, and no other place truly feels like home.]

[Shower opened up. Apologies for the quick closing.]

Downtown today. Then SoHo for MLP and me. In The Heights tonight [yes, I AM the only one dressing the hell up]. Hopefully some local fare throughout the day.

More to follow, don't you worry, little babies.

All my friends are baristas.

Happy Finals Week!

Here's to hoping your caffeine binges don't lead to murder, child abuse, and an end a la the WWotW.

le Café - Oldelaf (english subtitles)
Uploaded by Boebis

Xenophobagel

I'd like to point out to the SNU student body that there is a staunch racist in our midst.

The toaster oven.

How is ecru bread considered a medium toast?

The TO refuses to toast in anything other than slightly varied shades of white. This is completely unacceptable in the current day and age. Can we not finally put racial discrimination behind us?

Stop your "whites-only" policy, MiniVeyor. Brown English muffins are full members of carbohydrate society, and do not deserve your marginalization.

Adventures in Anthropology: Oklahoman American Society

I take this brief [read: highly extended] break from my paper writing [women and sexuality in the films of Catherine Breillat, holla!] to share observations of my current environment.

Aside from the tower of intellect sitting across from me, the surroundings are amusingly dismal.

Where do you go when you need free WiFi late into the night?

Beverly's Pancake House [24 hours!]. Shitty food, and fast. Full lard content whenever your heart desires. Half slab of pork product at 3:45 AM? Yours! Large stack of pancakes covered in "maple" syrup at 4? Yes ma'am!

Ordered hot tea. It comes with honey sauce.

What the hell is honey sauce?

Oh Oklahoma, I am adoring you and your shameless obesity, which you soundtrack with Rod Stewart without any discernible irony.

Have you seen my childhood?

Sitting in BES, waiting for the exam to start, listening to the X-Men theme with Josh.

Oh. Em. Eff. Gee. I am having a childhood flashback right now.

Ripping out of my bed on Saturday morning, tearing through my house [which was a maze], sliding on my knees to a halt in front of the TV set, right in between my brothers, Sean and Brandon, rubbing away the sting of carpet burn through the opening montage. Sweet memories.

I miss being a kid.



By the way: Gambit = hottest comic book character EVER.
Then again, I'm a sucker for a bad-ass Southern boy.

In the same vein . . .

Researching for my B[e]S paper. Interesting passage about consumer sovereignty:

"Then again, if consumer sovereignty were anything like a reality, certainly the government would be diligent in protecting consumers' interests. Sadly such is not the case. Instead, the government places strict limits on consumer sovereignty, especially where any substantive consumer sovereignty might collide with corporate interests. Consider, for example, how shabbily the government treats consumers in regulating the food industry. In deference to corporate interests, government officials routinely refuse consumer demands to label genetically modified food or to inform consumers which processed food contains irradiated ingredients. . . . Because of their need to sell a product that people do not want, 'industry leaders [in the biotechnology industry] view consumers . . . as hostile forces threatening their economic viability.' The government allows industry to process meat in unsanitary conditions. It proposes to allow industry to use radiation to disinfect feces. Consumers, of course, would prefer having the meat packers prepare their produce more carefully rather than irradiating feces. After all, poop, even if irradiated, is not a particularly appealing ingredient. Withholding such knowledge helps to ensure the consumer's loyalty."

Makes me want to be a farmer. Or just not eat ever again.